return of why i'm doing this

This is a continuation of a discussion/blog that I wrote on Friday. I also posted this on a great weight loss support site that I'm part of. After reading some of the replies and conversations started by my original post, here's what I said:



I really worry about the messages I'm sending to my kids- especially knowing that one of the girls that was in my youth group has struggled with anorexia since at least 3rd or 4th grade. Yes! 3rd or 4th grade! So, I'm constantly wondering about the messages that my kids are getting- are they the right ones? Will talking about this stuff make it better or worse for them? Will it lead them to make the right choices or just worry them about making the wrong ones? Will it lead them down the path of pain that I went through- being overweight (or at least thinking I was until it became a reality)? Let the mommy-neurosis begin!

I definitely agree with not using food as a reward or a bribe. Food should be what it is- something to fuel your body- to give you the energy that you need to do what you need to do. Sure, sometimes that food can be enjoyable (and sometimes, downright heavenly), but in the end, it's just food. Whenever Miss B asks me about whether or not something is healthy (she's the main one that's concerned about it at this point), I'll usually either tell her yes (if it is) or if it's something that's really not, I tell her it's a "sometimes" food- something that I picked up at a health presentation they had for the students at our school. I think that's a good way to look at it; something that's okay to have sometimes, but not all of the time. Overall, my kids do pretty well making healthy choices. They love fruit and some veggies (which I don't cook for them enough). I try to limit their candy, because to my mind, it's pretty much just toxic junk to their bodies and behavior. Princess Tippytoes (my 4-year-old) is just getting through a big phase of expecting desert after every meal. I think we're finally getting past that. Usually, at meals, I put a bit of everything on their plate- the minimum that I expect them to eat. Once they've finished that, they can ask for seconds of anything they want. If they do not finish what's on their plate, they don't get desert or anything else to eat, but I don't force them to be a "Clean Plate Club Member". I remember those hellish days as a child- spent stockpiling chewed roast beef in my cheeks like a chipmunk until I could escape and spit it out or throwing my green beans up at the window underneath the valance when my parents weren't looking. Just in case you're wondering, yes, they stick to the window . So, by now, this is really long and I don't know exactly where it's going. All I know is that our saga continues. Tonight, Miss B asked me if she's going to be fat when she grows up because she doesn't exercise. I pointed out that she exercises in gym class and by playing outside or at the park when it's nice out. I also reminded her that next month she and her brother and sister will be starting martial arts and that is exercise too. So, then she begged me to sign up for martial arts with them. I told her that I didn't think I'd fit in well in the Li'l Dragons class and reminded her of what I am doing to exercise- walking- and what I'm going to do- bring in the exercise bike so I can use that too. These answers seemed to satisfy her for now, but I'm sure her brain is still buzzing... it always is.